1 Stop worrying about Robin van Persie's new contract.
2 Trust Jacques Kallis. I scored the first of my eight tons at 36.
3 Take it on the chin when he gets a ton at Newlands this week.
4 Take more road trips through South Africa, Garden Route and Meiringspoort were stunning.
5 Stop smoking. Fags may be cheap here but my lungs are expensive.
6 Leave the Peter Roebuck story alone. It's done. He's gone.
7 Leave my fellow sports journalists to their own devices. Enough already.
8 Make Scoop! South Africa's best-selling Sunday. There's a niche in the market.
9 Make Candidly Collins on eNews every Monday morning a must-watch.
10 Stop trying to bbq hamburgers and sausages. This is braai country.
11 Don't sound so smug when Chelsea and Man U lose. Only Spurs.
12 Don't got back to London for the 2012 Olympics. You know what the traffic will be like.
13 Erm.. .that's it. Any further suggestions below please!